Ladies, do you own any cuffed slacks? Cause I do! And a few years ago I went through this cuffed pants phase, where every pair of work slacks I bought had them…not knowing at the time that they actually make you look shorter than you actually are. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have bought so many pairs that I still wear today because I don’t want to waste them. But as Joey from Friends would say, that’s a “moo” point. I don’t like to waste clothes so I’m going to wear those cuffs to their death. Which brings me to a story I’d like to share.
It was a sunny morning at work. I was in the office, in my cute black cuffed slacks and I believe a red thin sweater. My normal routine when I get to work is turn on the computer and while it’s booting up, I get my usual cup-a-joe. As I walk down the hallway leading to the kitchen area, I felt fresh and cute. You know, that feeling you get when everything fits just perfect and you KNOW you look cute? However, all of a sudden I feel this slight tug at my right pant leg. Everything seemed to move in slow motion now and as I process in my head what was going on, I realized that my left heel of my pump was attached to my right leg cuff. Now, I’m sure this has happened to many of ya’ll who’s ever owned a pair of cuffed slacks. So, I don’t need to go into detail the physics of how a heel can get inside cuffs. Just trust that it happens all the time with thinner heels. The law of gravity took ahold of me and my whole body started to tilt forward, and I’m thinking “I’m going to wipe out right in this office!” You know that thing you do when you stumble and you try to gain your balance back? Well, that thought did come to mind as I tilted forward, but if you’re tilting past the 45 degree mark, you just need to accept the fact that you’re gonna fall. In my head I thought, “Oh f**k it!” Like a seasoned actress, I committed to the fall. And I fell hard! It wasn’t a feminine stumble that you see in the movies. It was a WIPE OUT and the thump that came out of it was to be heard by all cubes surrounding the kitchen area. Those stupid earthquake ready floors only made the thump louder. I felt like I was 350 pounds! I thought I saw smoke, and heard sirens as the secretaries sitting in that area rushed over in slow motion to help me up. I quickly jumped up, with bruising to the ego more than anything and told the secretaries that I was fine. I smile, brushed off my pants, shift my eyes back and forth towards ALL of the people that were still looking at me, and continue off into the kitchen to get my coffee.
Through this lovely experience, I’ve decided to part with those slacks. I do have a gazillion other cuffed slacks though but rest assured, these ones are sewn closed to give the illusion of a cuff. =)
Now my OOTD for the day. This tank I bought on sale after seeing it in the catalog with the Blooming Lattice Cardi. I returned the cardi because, sadly, I was unable to find things I already had in the closet to wear with it, but kept this tank because it's very colorful and different. It fits very well and I'm glad I kept it.
Look...CUFFS!!! See what I mean? These ones are fake tho, sewn together so my heels won't get caught in them. Besides, the heels I was wearing today probably were too thick anyway.